Twilight Princess Boss Review

What do you think of the boss fights of Twilight Princess?

They suck.

Diababa. Use the dungeon item in a very clearly telegraphed way. Then do it when you have a moving target that you snap onto and mash on the boss’s weak point for a while. Occasionally does easily avoided attacks.

Fyrus, shoot boss’s head. Press A near interaction point then equip dungeon item. Unequip dungeon item and mash on weak point. Do this 3 times.

Morpheel, midna gives you a hint to use the dungeon item. Auto-target grab boss’s weak point. Slash it a little, repeat. Occasionally fish get sent at you, these explode after being hit. Second phase it starts swimming around, so you do too. It doesn’t damage you on contact. Auto-target grab the weak point when you’re close, then mash.

Stallord, gives you a free shot to establish how the fight works. Then you go around the arena and shoot at it when it’s not breathing fire in your direction and try to avoid the skeletons that pop up or destroy them to hit its vertebra. There’s also a spinner on the same track that moves faster than you. This is kind of dynamic. There’s a reason to get off the track regularly. You gotta avoid things, or hit them. You gotta aim a little. You might even need to fight the enemies to get back to the track. And they pop up randomly, so you gotta react to how they pop up each time and plan on the spot. Too bad this phase only goes for a few reps. Second phase, jump to the other side when a projectile gets shot, mash on weak point, and eventually you win. Lame.

Blizzeta, keep moving and not too long in any one direction on a slippery surface to avoid the ice pillars. Throw the iron ball at them when they run out. Run out of the circle when they’re dropped on you after that, hit middle with iron ball. It’s mildly tough, slightly dynamic, but not really impressive.

Armgohma, shoot boss when it stops moving and opens its eye. Use dungeon item. Mash to kill the tiny spiders. And man, how lame is it that you’re not allowed to hit the boss with the dungeon item when it’s rightside up? That’s SO LAME. Cycle repeats, except boss shoots lasers and you gotta shoot the boss before it hits you with the laser, and the minispiders and laser can be out at the same time, which is sorta dynamic. This only happens once though. Second phase, either mash the spider cluster or shoot a bomb arrow.

Argorok, clawshot up, clawshot his tail, use iron boots, repeat. Second phase, clawshot up to flying plants. Clawshot along the line to avoid fire breath and to get behind him. Clawshot weak point. Mash. Repeat. Only Aonuma could make a dragon fight this lame.

Zant, shield or dodge projectiles, throw gale boomerang, mash when he gets hit. Phase 2, wear iron boots. Shield or dodge projectiles. Mash afterwards. Phase 3, wait until the helmet opens up, clawshot him, mash. Repeat with 4 heads. phase 4, roll into the pillar he’s on. Mash. Mildly dynamic here. 5, get out of way, hit with iron ball, mash. 6, avoid attacks, shield, mash.

Puppet Zelda, ping pong, mash. Move off the triangle. LOL, THE VIDEO EDITOR SPED IT UP BECAUSE IT WAS SO SLOW.

Pig Ganon, get out of the way when he runs at you. Turn around until you see the blue portal. Autotarget shot him. Mash weak point. Get out of way if you see shadow above you. Simple.

Horseback Ganon, keep up behind him on horseback so zelda can semi-autotarget him. Avoid projectiles coming at you. When he’s stunned catch up and slash him. This is clearly more complex than the others because the video author actually had trouble with it with his baby skill level.

Dorf Ganon, he can rush you, this can be shielded. he can jump behind you, breaking your lock-on, prompting you to shield or move out of the way. Can do a thrust stab. I think you can hit him after any of these, or mash if he’s not doing anything. Whether he blocks is seemingly random, but he always blocks after 2 hits. Can straight up boot you, unreactable, if you’re close to him. Kind of a failure by action game standards, but it does at least somewhat represent a semi-competent baby’s first enemy design. I guess I can’t totally slight it. If you attack at the same time as his dash, then you go into a mash sequence, which gives you a free hit if you win it. He will occasionally dodge attacks randomly. The circle behind move can hit him if it actually hits behind him. He also has an attack where he sucker punches you then combos with a sword slice. If he’s knocked off his feet then his recovery animation is invincible, which is lame.

The speedstrat is apparently to not lock on, run behind him, jump attack then spin slash. Also sometimes do the running slash as you’re to get Ganon to trigger his block, holding him in place a bit for you to do the 2 hit combo. He’s caught in this pattern very easily, and most of his attacks will miss if he attempts any. I’m glad dark souls was built around both using and not using lock-on, because this guy clearly assumed that players would only lock on.

Still, I guess it’s an attempt to make a real enemy design, even if it’s below average. He has decent attack variety at least. I’m mildly impressed I think, even if I’d call it shit as a Dark Souls or DMC boss.

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