Why does Bed of Chaos suck?

What exactly makes the bed of chaos fight bad? I don’t disagree its bad, I just don’t have a grasp of that kind of stuff like you do

So basically, there’s these two roots on each side. To kill bed of chaos, you need to run up to these roots and deal 1 hit to each of them. The bed has these two big hands that try to sweep you towards the center, dealing damage and knockback if you’re hit.

Once one of these roots is destroyed is when the fight starts getting bad. Suddenly, the ground starts falling out in specific places, effectively making this thin lane you need to run up to get to the next root with one side being a wall, the other being death. The snag is that the bed of chaos can now swipe directly down these lanes, hitting you. The collision on its hands is tangible and not only deals damage, but also incurs knockback, and will physically push you along, usually into one of the pits. Another downside is that no matter how fast you run, you can’t run faster than the hand sweeping cycles, and it’s not really clear how big the hitboxes of these weird and wispy hands is.

Once you destroy both roots, the bed of chaos starts casting firestorm. This is where it gets really fun. Flames start popping up all over the place. It also has blades come from the central body that can hit you. It’s not really clear what the hitboxes of any of these are and they ignore shields. So you need to backtrack from this annoying journey down the lane to the root into the central area while all this shit is attacking you, and then go straight into the body of the bed of chaos, where there’s another hold in the way that you need to jump down into onto a large root accurately or you’ll fall. If you don’t know where the holes are during this fight it’s very easy to just run into one and fall to your death.

This boss fight is so bad that the devs decided to let your progress in it be persistent as some small sign of mercy as to the fuckery of this fight. Of course, the nearest bonfire is like, 3-4 minutes away, so getting the runback will take literally eternity. You can also save and quit on destroying a root, which because you’ll end up at the boss fog means you don’t need to backtrack and is way more consistent for beating the boss overall. Plus it’s possible to cheese the boss with ranged weapons so you don’t need to deal with those janky-ass hands sweeping you into pits. Plus, even if you get to the end, it’s still possible to get fire stormed inside the bed of chaos’s body.

Thankfully there is a skip for bed of chaos. I’ve done it a few times (and also gotten hit by a firestorm after throwing the second firebomb and been pushed back into the pit for a death) This skip is almost cool enough to make bed of chaos tolerable.

Here’s how to do it with no deaths or cheese:

What do you think makes the bonus boss fights in Dark Souls 2 like the ancient dragon and Vendrick terrible?

The pacing was crap. They had a billion health and would kill you if they so much as nicked you. This meant that the only reasonable way anyone was gonna beat them was finding a cheese strategy (low/no risk) of some kind and repeating it for like, an hour. Bonus for the ancient dragon was how it had some janky hitboxes and could fly up and bomb the whole area unless you got out of the way fast enough. They didn’t have the most interesting attack patterns in the world. Plus, if you want a fight to go on for that long and still feel engaging, you really need phases where the boss changes up their attacks. This also indirectly discourages cheese, players are more willing to engage when they feel like they’re learning things.

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